In a perfect world, a utopia, there is no discrimination, bullying, sexism, homo-antagonism, racism, classicism or judgement based on religion.
However, our reality is that of a dystopia. The minuscule differences that set people apart can range from bullying to squabbles to all out war. Ironically humans are a social species.
Understanding, tolerate and allyship determine whether one lives or dies.
Mental health professionals say the seeds of empathy, the ability to understand and share the feelings of another, are sown at birth with the environment another crucial factor.
This is the age old question of nurture versus nature.
“Empathy plays an important role in our society’s ability to function, promoting a sharing of experiences, needs, and desires between individuals.
“Our neural networks are set up to interact with the neural networks of others in order to both perceive and understand their emotions and to differentiate them from our own, which makes it possible for humans to live with one another without constantly fighting or feeling taken over by someone else,” said Psychology Today.
Empathy, according to research, may be taught rather than being inborn.Its inverse is apathy, which causes a lack of feeling or emotion which leads to indifference to human life and hatred.
“Paradoxically, what makes the feeling of apathy unique is that it’s essentially the feeling of not feeling.”
Here are some reasons why people bully or discriminate against others:
– A superiority complex, an attitude of superiority which conceals actual feelings of inferiority and failure.
– A desire to dominate others.
– Low self-esteem.
– Anger, frustration and jealousy.
– Social difficulties, and being a victim of bullying themselves.
Human’s capability for empathy and caring for others is underestimated in a world filled with cruelty, violence and being divided in terms of differences being at the root most of these conditions.
Yet, under the gloom, the seeds of empathy remain, they just need a fertile society in which to grow and flourish. Each one of us can choose to plant, till the soil, water and let the sun’s ray shine on them if we truly want to leave in a more peaceful world.
During the month of October, IOL carried stories highlighting the prevalence of bullying, delving into its underlying causes, identifying what bullying looks like, and suggesting courses of action and avenues to seek help if you feel you are being bullied.
Bullying is a choice; choose better.
Join us as we at IOL say No To Bullying.
* No To Bullying is an IOL initiative. If you feel like you are being bullied, reach out to:
- Childline — 116
- Stop Gender Violence — 0800 150 150
- South African Depression and Anxiety Group — 0800 567 567
- Sonke Gender Justice — 0861 322 322
- Legal Aid — 011 877 2000
- South African Federation for Mental Health — 011 781 1852
*Xolile Mtembu is a Digital Journalist at IOL.